Thoughts..

The weekend was nice. I attended a Christening and reception of one of my best male friends children. He is a popular guy so many came from far and wide to attend this event. I showed up fashionably late, which I was really trying not to do, but I guess it is in the genes. You know I like to observe and over analyze things( some of the side effects of my obsessive compulsive disorder) so while at the reception I am observing many things. There were children everywhere. Nicely dressed in there church outfits, behaving themselves. I looked at the mothers, they looked happy, tired but happy. Then I start to think “Maybe I am ready to settle down and have kids, it does not look like so much work.” 45 minutes passed and all hell broke loose, these nice children started to move around, make all kinds of unnecessary noise, cry. It was then I realized that my eye was twitching. The noise was more than the music. The mothers looked like they wanted to be in the other room dancing but just cant break away. Then it dawned on me that I may not be ready. Especially not ready to take this on by myself. How I go manage without husband? My cousin was on the way to the dance floor with me, she has a 5 month daughter but she also has a good husband that does not mind holding his daughter while she goes and breaks a sweat on the dance floor. I would love to have children at a young age just because it seems like the best thing to do, but am I ready to leave selfishness, and impatient behind?

Next observation: Some women na ashawo!!! I know men can confuse us. Tell us sweet things and we may fall, but once we figure out that he has a woman it is time to smarten up and let that man go. We NEED to do this just to keep the integrity of relationships in check. What will happen if all men were able to have women on the side without the threat of being exposed to there main girl? They will continue to cheat and even cheat more. That being said, as WOMEN let us respect ourselves and not deal with a man who are in relationships. I know it is a dog eat dog world and we have to fight for what we want but remember that the shoe may be on the other foot sometime in the future. Trust me it will not feel good. Charma is inevitable.

Another thought: I use to think that it is ok to marry outside of your ethnic group whether African with African American, or Nigerian with a Senegalese. These days I am beginning to rethink that. There is a homegurl who is dating from a different country within Africa. At public events that she attends he is all into her. When she is not around he is all into every female around. I honestly believe that he wants to be with her. They have been together about 3 years but he just does not seem to know how to stay faithful. Is it my duty to tell the homegurl about her guys indiscretion? Most people tell me to stay out of it. That she knows her man, and let her find out on her own. I would not want that for me. If you see my man messing up and we are friends drop a sister a hint or two. Anyway, no one can even tell her anything because she is not part of that community. She is an outsider....the guy would not be able get away with it if they were from the same community. At the least, the gossip would have reached her.

Anyway, I am writing this in between work and I just got real busy....