Why am I helping him? I really want to be there for him. Not sure why. Maybe all the guilt I feel for treating him so bad.( Granted he was not a saint either but...) I take his random calls. He picks my calls whenever he CAN. Then today he makes a mistake and does not cut his phone off when he leaves me a message. Then, I hear "her". She is helping him as well. But she should be helping him. They are together now, not us. I hate how I feel..... I hate they are together... I hate that there child is sooo cute... I hate it. This growing knot in my stomach will never go away until I let him go. Time has passed and he is still there. I keep letting him back in. A part of me keeps letting him in because I want to pay "her" back. I am only causing harm to myself. Let go and be free.
-----------STOP TAKING HIS CALLS--------------

Charma

I was the worst girlfriend in the world. Two years later I am just coming to grips with this. How to deal with the guilt is what I am struggling with now. Charma is inevitable... well at least I think it is...I would hate for all these things to come back on me.

Trapped between a rock and a hard place....

- I have loved him for more than several years.... but he with someone else now... I miss him. Was my homeboy but I treated him like CRAP. But he has grown into a DOG( she thinks it because of his new found freedom)

- I have been dating him off and on for 3 years. He is not ready to really commit but I miss him. He is not dedicated and dependable... but I already put my self in this position with him. I feel like I need to conquer him.

- I have the best God fearing man in the world. I just love him.... but he has not discussed marriage.....plus he is just telling me he loves me for the first time.( 2 years later). Parents hate me...

SEE THIS THE KIND OF STUFF PEOPLE ARE CALLING ME ABOUT..... People are dying from lack of proper health care. Matter of the heart are definitely important, but it should not be what consumes us. Call me and discuss more pressing matters or Leave me alone.

Deuces

EMPTY

T'was the day after Christmas and I am getting calls regarding others problems.!!. I am not sure if they don't get it but I don't have any emotions or sympathy to give. I am drained, just empty. Sad to say, but it is true. I find solace in just bottling up all my emotions, doing my work, avoiding tedious conversations with little to NO substance. Hopefully, with time I will get better. So find your way....we ALL got stuff we are going through. Maybe we need to all do what the Caucasians normally do... THERAPY.

Nigeria turns 49!!!

Nigeria Celebrates 49 Years Of Independence

Today marks 49 years of independence from British colonial rule. Today should be a day that we look back at all the accomplishments that Nigeria as well as Nigerians have made since independence. Unfortunately, many Nigerians continue to express frustration over widespread hunger, unemployment and the pace of development. We should all join together and ask ourselves “what can we do to make our county a better place?” Instead of complaining (which is dully justified) we need to think of what we can do here or back home to make our government accountable. We can also selflessly find ways individually to unite and give back to our county. A positive attitude goes a long way. Directly quoting Governor of Lagos, Fashola from 2008 "Many will be tempted to focus on our failures and to lament our national deficiencies; they will compare our accomplishment to our potentials and conclude that we could have done better. But let us see the cup as half full rather than half empty." It would be more beneficial to choose a positive attitude in our assessment of the country. Fashola suggested that adopting a positive attitude would enable the country to count its blessings and access our strengths so we can have the courage and will to turn yesterday's short comings into tomorrow's successes. So as we celebrate today and all through the weekend think not “What can my country do for me?” but “What can I do for my country?

Happy Independence Day!!!!

Yard Sale

We had our "Back to School Ladies of NOW Yard Sale" 2day. It was ok. We started around 830am. Our first sale was a toy for $.50. It was not until 10am that business started to pick up. We made $180.00. Thats pretty good considering we quit 1 hour early. We could not take the heat!!! I am proud of us. We will be using the money to buy school supplies for students that we are mentoring. Most of our students attend an alternative school in Atlanta. These kids are not bad at heart. They have just used the wrong ways to seek attention.

Good job Ladies of NOW!!!